Draft Day is here!
I love the NFL Draft. It provides a chance for any team to
begins rebuilding their team. Unless you are the Browns. I don’t care if Kevin
Costner is your GM, you haven’t had a good draft in forever. (Note: This year
the Browns hold 2 first round picks! I wouldn’t get too excited fans. Last time
that happenedthey drafted Trent Richardson and Brandon Weeden. They are both no
longer on the team.)
The Jets used to be notoriously bad at drafting. Skipped
over Warren Sapp for Kyle Brady. Skipped over Dan Marino for Division II player
Ken O’Brien who SUCKED! Here are some other choices. You don’t have to watch
the whole video, but the fans reactions are pretty great.
"It's obvious to me that the Jets just don't understand what the draft is all about" - Mel Kiper Jr.
I came up with a drinking game for the draft a last year and
thought I should share it with the world. I removed the old rules about Manti
Te’o and his fake girlfriend, but kept some older rules that might be outdated,
but could still happen.If I think of some good ones later in the day, I'll update this post.
So grab a drink and enjoy!
Drink anytime a team makes a pick
Drink twice if your team makes a pick.
Take a drink if after the draft it turns out, instead of the
NFL, all draftees have to enter the army.
Anytime a trade happens, take a drink. If the trade involves
a player, take 2. If it involves Pokemon cards, finish.
Drink anytime Chris Berman makes a sound that isn't an
actual word. Finish if his whooping attracts birds to flock to him
Drink when someone says "Tebow."
Drink if a drafted players walk out song is
"Accidentally Racist" LLCoolJ and Brad Paisley by Donald Sterling. (Updated
from last year)
Drink anytime Mel Kiper and Todd McShay has a hissy fit with
each other
Drink anytime Jon Gruden gets a huge hard on for a
Quarterback.
Drink anytime ESPN gets a huge hard on for Jon Gruden
Drink if a projected high player falls down the draft. Drink
again if the commissioner moves him into a windowless room to cry.
Drink every time Jon Gruden says "Here's a guy"
Drink for the length of time that the crowd boos Roger Goodell
Drink if a term from another sport is used (i.e. homerun, slamdunk)
Drink if any draftee does cartwheels around the entire stage
until security takes him away.
Drink if ESPN cuts to a bathroom cam, where you watch and
listen to the undrafted players take major dumpage
Drink every time Chris Berman turns/forces a player's name
into a ridiculous pun
Drink if the player the Jets draft screams out,
"NOOOOO! NOT THE JETS! FUCK THIS! FUCK THIS! FUCK THIS!
Drink if the Jaguars or Browns forget that today is draft
day and oversleep their pick
Drink if a player gives Goodell a nice tap on the fanny when
hugging.
Drink every time Goodell dances to Gangham Style before
every pick
Drink any time Schefter's chair breaks
Drink any time ESPN ties product placement into their
commentary.
Finish your drink if any draft pick seriously injures
themselves walking to the stage
Drink if a team misses their pick. Finish drink if the team
pretends to have done it on purpose.
Finish your drink if ANYONE, a draftee, a commentator, an
audience member, ANYONE defecates on camera.
If Bill Polian's speaking puts you to sleep, when you wake
up, finish your drink
Drink for every stylish looking draftee. Chug for every
horribly dressed draftee
Drink any time the movie "Draft Day" is discussed
Drink anytime a players name is said incorrectly or if too
much effort is taken to say the name correctly
Drink when Ha-Ha Clinton Dix is picked. Finish drink if he
goes to your team.
Drink anytime someone talks about Javedeon Clowney’s work
ethic. (Finish drink if they quote Hey Arnold’s Grandpa’s line “Kids these days
ain’t got no work ethic.)
Drink anytime “Johnny Football” is used on Johnny Manziel.
Finish drink if “Johnny Football” is said about any other player in the draft.
Drink if the song “Bridge over Trouble Water” is used to
describe Teddy Bridgewater.
Drink if the draftee player pulls a “Farve” and is wearing
jorts when drafted.
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