Things That I Hate #1: Popcorn Jelly Bellys

"Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and Popcorn Jelly Bellys." - Martin Luther King Jr

Note: I have no idea what the plural of Jelly Belly is. You'd think it was Jelly Bellies, but as the name Jelly Belly is trademarked it could also be Jelly Bellys. I've chosen to use "Jelly Bellys" for this post, but if any of you learn the real answer, please let me know and I'll update this. Thank you.

Enough is enough! I'm sick of it. This has gone on too long. Cue Twisted Sister's "We're Not Gonna Take It." This white and yellow little shit! It's disgusting. It's ungodly. It's inhumane. And it needs to go. I'm talking of course about the Popcorn Flavored Jelly Belly.

Let me say I love candy. I LOVE IT! I take my candy very seriously too. I have my whole life. It's delicious and sugary and comes in so many varieties. From Gummy Bears to Sweet Tarts to Mike & Ike's to Twizzlers. There's a candy for everyone. Candy doesn't discriminate. It embraces and loves.

Except for one.

I’m not sure if there’s a God. I don't know what happens when we die; if there is an afterlife or not. If there is a heaven and a hell and I end up in the hotter one, I'd be tortured with hot coals and thrown into lava along while being sodomized by endless amounts of demons all while being force fed Popcorn flavored Jelly Bellys.

Might as well be a cyanide pill

Favorite Movie Quotes

Movies are wonderful. Stories that let you leave your troubles behind for just a couple of hours while you lose yourself in a whole new world. I've seen tons of movies in my time and I wanted to share some of my favorite lines from a few of them. I'm sure you'll remember them exactly as I do.

The Usual Suspects

"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist. And making people do terrible things to each other. And spreading disease. And possessing people...Well he IS the Devil. Let's agree that he does a lot of bad horrible things. That's like his whole thing. That's why he exists. It's all about deception and tricks for that guy. Not me though. Not good old Verbal Kint. I’m just a regular dude over here. I don’t even know any tricks. I do eat Trix sometimes but that’s mostly to piss off my pet rabbit... And just like that, poof, he’s gone. The devil that is. Not my pet rabbit " - Verbal Kint/Keyser Soze